Hesitation

I go to take off on a big wave, hesitate, then next thing you know there goes Paul over the falls. A pretty girl walks by and we make eye contact, I don’t say anything. Boom, now I’m in my head and I’m awkward. I’m ripping my scoot, I see a gap to hit, I hesitate, now everyone is confused and now I might be dead. I have a thought, then stop moving my fingers to write because I hesitate and judgements start flowing in and it’s gone forever. I’m doing a scene and I have an urge to move my hands, but I don’t and now it’s weird. I want a donut, I hesitate and I don’t act on the urge. Oh wait… that’s a good thing. (Is it?)

Hesitation ruins my flow in a variety of circumstances in life. A hesitation can be a microsecond or years. Acting without hesitation feels more true to myself. On the flip side, acting without hesitation has gotten me in some trouble… But hey. That’s how you learn.

Daily Stoke Report - Today, so far so stoked. Yesterday - kinda trash. Why? Ate like garbage, didn’t talk to too many people. Didn’t create much on the interweb. Workouts were lackluster.

Also, I’m fasting today. It’s 3:30 pm at time of writing and i’m doing well. My brain is alive. I’ve been wandering and writing so I haven’t thought too too much about food, except for the morning right when I woke up.

I fast every once in a while because the science seems interesting and a discipline thing. I’m trying to figure out what works best for me with the ultimate goal of getting to a place where i simply don’t think about it.